Anxiety

Anxiety,

What is Anxiety? Most have it; many suffer from it. I was one of them. The medication was supposed to control the thoughts and rabbit holes I would take myself down. Spiraling out of control until I ended up thinking about suicide daily because that seemed like the only reasonable way to end this internal suffering. But does this have to define anxiety? Does anxiety have to be negative? My relationship with anxiety has changed drastically. I used to look at it like the monster in the story told by Stephen King, "It." The beast takes the shape of whatever strikes fear in its potential victims to feast on them. The only way to defeat this monster is by standing up to it, showing that you are not scared anymore and willing to do whatever it takes to take your life back from this white hot spot inside of your mind. Our anxiety is our friend; our anxiety isn't hurting us. We are hurting ourselves by misinterpreting the internal data we receive and the confusion from other people telling us to run away. The biggest hurdle in our lives is ourselves. Listening to ourselves is a leap of faith. Once we face our fears and organize our emotions around them, those issues no longer affect us. But become a strength. Your mind starts to clear up, making your brain more organized. This feeling builds inside your mind, cementing you where you are now. Slowly, your life will begin to change because this feeling inside is more significant than anything you can buy or take. Nothing beats it. Because you did it, and nobody can take it away from you. It's all you. A process that has allowed me to do this most effectively is writing. Writing is the physical manifestation of your mind, allowing you to see the path that your self is pointing you in. Positive thinking comes into play once you know that process lives in the material world on paper. The feeling comes alive as you see a plan unfolding before you; all that is left is to take the next step.

The discomfort of facing our internal boogeymen doesn't last forever; it will end. Be uncomfortable, sit in it, and let the inner tornado rip up all that is there to make room for the new—allowing this to be a place of peace and solace inside you. Giving you the ability to handle situations with grace and ruthless intent to fight for who you are.

Anxiety has become my friend, the reliant person I can trust to steer me toward my ultimate goal of living life as my authentic self.

Creating this mindset is a long journey that never ends. This could be intimidating; however, something that never ends allows for endless growth.

Lean in, forgive yourself, and push forward.

Remember that it's always Day 01, and it's never too late to start living good to die great.

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